stfuconservatives:

shortformblog:

stfuconservatives:

paper-is-patient:

sharkinthedungeon:

it’s like i broke up with obama and he’s not taking it well

Snorting

He keeps saying it’s the absolute last time he’s going to ask me to dinner and it keeps being a lie.

You think Obama’s bad? Biden wants to take me out for a cup of coffee.

And Michelle was having trouble getting a birthday card signed.

You’d think she’d leave me alone after that, but …

So much pressure.

It’s like I broke up with Barack Obama and his BFF Joe Biden is trying to get with me and Barack’s new girlfriend Michelle is really nice to me and says I’m sooooo sweet to help with his birthday party and I really don’t want to tell her that Barack isn’t over me yet and she should move on with her life. Caught in an awkward love triangle with the POTUS.

madamethursday:

[Image: A photo of a smoke detector/smoke alarm on a ceiling with the text: “Oh you’re cooking are you? Allow me to play you the song of my people.”]

dumbthingswhitepplsay:

richardgereshift:

why is this so funny to me ksldjf;sd

loooool

Most relevant pic on Tumblr to my life. 

awkwardfeministmoments:

[Image description: Background is 6 piece pie style color split with pink and blue alternating. Foreground is a picture of a grey tabby cat wearing a yellow wig. Top text reads “That awkward moment when” Bottom text reads “’feminists’ say you can’t be a feminist if you don’t identify as cisgender” End description.]

From the comments on a recent post. 

rainbowlovesher:

aksdfjghlakdjfghlkh so cute.

whitewhine:

“He just said no and made me go on a cruise”

lol. 

gaywrites:

But really. 

betterbooktitles:

Mark Z. Danielewski: House of Leaves